Boundaries

I've been going through a lot of emotional turmoil lately and was told by a few people that I need to set up boundaries. Here is a very good article about boundaries. I am not good at this. For one thing, I don't really like conflict and I know if I suddenly start setting up boundaries, I'm going to be facing a lot of conflict. After all, I've spent nearly 33 years doing whatever everyone else wanted me to do.

For another thing, I have to have a clear idea of what my boundaries are. This is difficult because I am a people pleaser so I want everyone to be happy and I've been willing in the past to do things I absolutely did not want to do just to make someone else happy.

I told Rosemary today (yes, I know you don't know who Rosemary is, don't worry about it) that everyone wants me for something. My clients want me. My children want me. My husband wants me. My educators want me. My teen group wants me. Rosemary said somewhere in there I've lost myself. That's exactly how I feel. Lost.

So it's boundary time I guess. I am not looking forward to this at all.

Coming Soon to a Living Room Near You

Hello Summer

Sorry I've been MIA for a while. We've been busy with soccer, baseball and summer! On Memorial Day S3 ended up marching in a parade with the American Legion which was pretty cool.

Waiting for the parade to start:

Here they come:

School let out at the end of May and besides all the sports, we've been hanging out with Beckham, gardening (pics of both coming soon) and swimming at the pool. The water is freezing and I don't how the kids can stand it but they do.

Look at the look of pure evil on S3's face. Splashing his brother.

Holy Sports Weekend Batman

I must be nuts. That's the only reason I can come up with for why I would say yes to two kids playing soccer and two kids playing baseball all in the same weekend. Here's how my weekend looked:

Friday 6 PM Ty had baseball at our home field
Saturday 7 AM Ty had soccer 30 minutes away
11:20 AM Ty had another game - same field
1:30 G had soccer 1.5 hrs away - 1.5 hrs back to...
4:20 Ty had another soccer game - same field as before.
Sunday 7 AM S3 had baseball 1.5 hrs away.
12:30 PM Coaches for S3's team decide to play a double header
5:30 PM Ty had another soccer game 2 hrs away.

I put somewhere around 250 miles on my minivan iin two days. That was a lot of running, even for me. And now onto the pictures...

Ty is the one with orange sleeves and black socks.

I'd forgotten how much I like to watch him play. He really focuses on the game and plays hard and even though they usually lose, he's always in a good mood afterward.

Waiting to sub in.

She hasn't been terribly aggressive with the bigger girls but when the ball comes near her, she wins it every time.

I've decided I must need to invest in some catcher's equipment because look who else decided to give the position a try...

Honestly at first I was a little disappointed because he's so good in the 2nd base/short stop position plus I really felt like it was cool that Ty had something kinda special by being catcher but once I saw S3 play I stopped being disappointed. He was fantastic.

It must be genetic. My dad was a catcher too.

Poor E. Doesn't she look totally worn out by all the sports?

The girls were driving me crazy by the end of the day so I let them play with my camera so they'd let me watch the soccer game. G accidentally caught a generational pic. It's not a great pic of any of us but I thought it was kinda cool.

So that was my crazy weekend. Now I'm going to go crash. If you need me, I'll be in bed.

Oh My Aching Back!

Today the kids and I got up and did our Saturday morning clean routine. It is mandatory; no matter what else is going on in our lives we all must clean on a Saturday morning. Why must we clean on a Saturday morning? Because if we don't clean on Saturday then I have to do it alone on Monday.

Anyway after that my nephew, "the boy" came over to help with a project we had to get done today. I'll explain that in a minute. See this great big huge trailer that belongs to my BIL John?


Well being the wonderful man that he is, he went and picked up two cubic yards of mulch for me on Friday night. However, his dad needed the trailer tonight so we had to spread two cubic yards of mulch by dinner time. Which is why it's now empty. And why my back hurts. I was in charge of shoveling the mulch out of the trailer and into the wheelbarrow. S3 was in charge of wheeling the wheelbarrow to the garden and Ty and The Boy were in charge of spreading. G and E got us drinks and tissues as needed and generally were cute and entertaining.

But what really amazes me about this whole project? Two cubic yards didn't cover my whole front bed. I still need probably another cubic yard to finish just the front. The back yard is a whole 'nuther back ache waiting to happen.

So now I'm just sitting in my rocker, quietly moaning to myself and playing with my jewelry stuff. The kids went to the park for a while and I think when they get back and get cleaned up we'll go visit my grandfather in the hospital and have some dinner. I just wish it would be this beautiful outside all year long.

Big News About Miss G

First of all her cast came off yesterday. What a hullabaloo that was. I picked up G from school and ran her to the doc and we were even early. Then we sat for 40 minutes. Finally at about 3:30 and I knew Ty was going to be getting off the bus at any minute and S3 had stayed out at the school for a math thing and needed to be picked up at 4:00. It takes a half hour to get out to the school so I needed to leave the office right then. So I went up to the front desk and even though I was really upset I managed to hold it together and explain my problem. The girl at the desk said, "Oh well she's next but we're waiting for a cast room and there's no way to tell how long it'll be. Besides they want to re-xray the thumb after the cast comes off." Between us, we decided I'd better reschedule. I was disappointed because G had soccer later and it's a pain in the rear to wrap up that cast for every game. I knew G was ready to get rid of the dumb thing anyway and I wasn't looking forward to that pout either.

So she pulls open her scheduling thing on the computer and asks me how next Tuesday works for me. I squeaked, "A WHOLE WEEK???" That was their first opening. I couldn't put G through another week of this dreadful thing on her arm but I couldn't think of what to do so I stood there and stared at the wall for a good thirty seconds trying to make my brain work. Finally I decided I'd see if Mel was around and if she could pick S3 up (I figured Ty would be ok for a half an hour or so. He is going to be ten in a couple of months). Mel didn't answer so I called my friend J who lives near the school. She didn't answer so finally I called Amy the Pampered Chef Lady. It turns out her daughter was out at the math thing too - she's in S3's class - and her friend was going to be bringing the kids home. She quick called with her other phone and S3 had a ride to Amy's house. Phew, crisis averted.

In the mean time the doctor's office really pulled for me. While I was frantically making phone calls, the front desk girl got a regular exam room set up with a saw and G got her cast cut off. We jumped right into the xray room and then right back to the exam room. The doc didn't take two minutes to come in and go over everything and we were out the door. They really hustled for us and I couldn't have appreciated it more.

So if you have an orthopedic problem I can highly recommend Commonwealth Orthopedic Associates. No doubt they're busy but they gave excellent service.

Onto big news number two.... G has been asked to play on a premier team! And not just a premier team but up a level on a U10 team! The coach of G's U9 indoor team said his daughter is playing and they were looking for two more. Of all the girls on the team, they felt there were only three who had the motivation and drive to be in the league and one of them was my Gracie. It's pricey and they travel and it's during baseball season (of which we have two kids on three teams) and since it's up a level she'll be playing with 9 and 10 year olds even though she just turned 8 so I know it's crazy but how could I say no? She loves to play and I love to watch her play. The coach's wife said if we had a big conflict with baseball schedules she would be able to cart G back and forth to games or whatever and while it's more expensive than club soccer it's not out of our reach. We're going to a practice on Sunday to see if this is really something we want to do but I already talked to the coach of the premier team and she wants G for sure. Even if we decide this is not for us right now, I'm extraordinarily proud that my girl was even asked. Being a girl rocks!

It's a Spiegel Crock Pot!

(Bonus points if you got the title of this post)

The rest of my week is going to be crazy. I'm running here and there and I'm working on top of everything else. Weeks like this I like to pull out my crock pot and let someone else do the cooking for me. To that end, this morning I was Googling some chicken recipes and came across a fantastic site. It's called "That's My Home" and besides having sections on conversions and substitutions, they have a big section of recipes. Tonight we're going to have Crock Pot Chicken Italian and Potatoes. I'll let you know how it goes.

Crock Pot Italian Chicken and Potatoes

• 4 boneless skinless chicken breasts


• 1 C. Italian salad dressing


• 2 t. Italian seasoning


• 1 C. grated parmesan cheese
  

5 to 6 potatoes; peeled, cut into wedges

Place chicken in bottom of crock pot. Sprinkle with half Italian dressing, spices, and the grated cheese. Place potatoes over chicken. Sprinkle with remaining ingredients.

Cover; cook on low 6-8 hours.

Busy, Busy, Busy

I ran home from work, caught an hour nap on the couch and then ran out to the school for G's 2nd grade chapel program. Every year each class takes one of the chapel programs that they have every Wednesday and they perform a little skit. The first year that S3 was in one I went thinking it was just a little thing. It is a big deal. They put costumes on and do a little play. They prepare for it for months and months. They memorize lines. They have a reception afterward.

I slept through it.

I know, I know, I get worst mom of the year award. G didn't know what time it started and I asked the boys who have both been attending chapel every Wednesday for years and years and they told me ten. I got there at nine thirty and it was over. Fortunately G was getting so much attention over her hot pink cast that she didn't seem to really care that much.


After that I ran home, grabbed a shower and then E and I scooted over to a diner to meet Phil and his family for lunch. I know I mentioned Phil in another post about books but I don't believe that I mentioned that his lovely wife just gave birth to their second daughter. I was beyond honored that they took the time to visit just so I could hold the baby. She is so precious! Before I went I told Steve that either I needed to hold this baby or he was going to have to buy me a cat. E will be five this year. In thirteen years this is the longest amount of time that I've gone without being pregnant or having a baby myself. I think the plan backfired. That baby is so tiny and lovable (you should have seen the teeny diapers!). I couldn't talk Tiffany and the baby into coming home to live with me so I guess I'll be looking for a cat.

I had to cut that visit shorter than I would have liked because I had to run Ty to the doctor's office. He has been home from school for the whole week mostly with complaints of a headache. I needed to get an excuse note from the doc since he's been out longer than three days and it turns out the poor kid has strep throat. So one more day home from school and a little amoxicillin and he'll be good as new. I just can't figure out why he'd have a headache but not a sore throat.

After that I was supposed to meet up with some girls from work for dinner and a drink (and to pick up men but I was planning on skipping that part) but I ended up passing out and sleeping like the dead for the rest of the night. When I got up today I had a message on my phone from one of the girls saying they were all beat too and going to make it another night.

I think I saw Steve yesterday. I waved to him when we passed on the road when I was coming home from and he was going to work. I must need to slow down.

Sleepless in Pennsylvania

Well it's been two years and I was just laughing at my dad for getting his juror notice in the mail so it figures it's about my turn. I don't know how it works but every two years both my father and I get jury duty notice within months of each other.

So Monday I worked then went straight from work to the court house. I ran into a really nice lady in the parking garage and sorta attached myself to her. She was pleasantly chatty and that helped me keep my eyes open. There were 150 or so of us that day and they split us into two groups for two criminal cases. Luckily for me I was not chosen to serve on the jury and by 11:30 I was back in the holding tank with my jacket, fantasies of my pjs dancing in my head.

It was not to be.

The guy in charge told us to go to lunch and come back by 1:15. They were going to take the losers from our group and the losers from the other group and throw us back together to form another jury pool. That case was horrible, horrible, horrible. The stuff of nightmares. I was praying the whole time I wouldn't be picked. I didn't even want to be in the same room with the defendant. I think just about half the jury stood up at some point and said they just didn't think they could be fair and impartial. It was bad. Again luckily for me, I was not picked to serve on that trial jury. I heard later that he was convicted. I hope it helps bring peace to the victims' family.

I think I got out of there around four, picked up E from my sister's house, grabbed Ty and G and ran to Body Zone for G's first indoor game this season. They ended up getting totally creamed. The score board went up to 10. I lost track at around 15. Eventually I saw on their website that G's team lost 25 - 0. Ouch. She really played her little heart out. She is a very intense competitor and afterward she invariably falls apart in my arms, her little body wracked with sobs. Then she's ok again. It's like she has to cry out all her tension before she can move on. She even cries when she wins. Her coach said to me, "We're going to have to work on that. This is supposed to be fun." Yeah. Good luck with that Coach.

I think I finally crawled in bed around 9 pm. Nearly 36 hours awake which I think might be a record for me but I'm not sure. I've heard one can be declared legally insane after three sleepless days. I was half way there.

Here's a bonus funny story for you:

While we were at soccer E was getting bored so I pulled my mp3 player out and hooked her up. She immediately started dancing as she usually does, executing beautiful pirouettes and butt-wiggles. She was performing a particularly complicated pirouette and ran *SMACK* into the clear glass wall that surrounds the soccer field. Being the good mother that I am I immediately started howling with laughter. This sweet grandmotherly type - you know the stereotypical little old lady with white hair and cookies type - turns to me and says, "Maybe we shouldn't laugh until we find out if she's ok."

I said, "Right now I can't see anything through my tears of laughter anyway."

By the by, she was ok. A little embarrassed but ok. Just don't tell her I told you this story.

Phew!

Wow, I suddenly and surprisingly became very busy these last few days. It's amazing how these things pop up so quickly. Tuesday was the last day I posted. Wednesday morning I drove to KOP to meet a friend who had flown in from Ohio for a business meeting. She and I had breakfast at the Corner Bakery (and I burned the stink out of my tongue!) but wow was it expensive! On the way home I stopped at a couple of stores including the grocery store to pick up a few things I'd been needing when my phone rang. Nancy, the scheduler at work had a call off and asked me to pick up that night.

When Steve is gone typically I don't like to work. It's just hard on me and the kids to schlepp all our things for bed and school and etc all the way to someone else's house and then all the way back home the next morning, not to mention the imposition on that person. Four kids tends to make a large crowd but it comes down to money doesn't it? When I am called in at the last minute like that I am paid extra for the inconvenience. So I figured if my parents were available to babysit I'd do it and if they weren't then that was a good reason to say no. They were ready, willing and able so I agreed to pick up even though I'd been up since 5:00 AM to be able to get to KOP and my friend that morning. It was a looooong night, let me tell you. I have some stories about work I could tell, oh my!

Anyway after all that it took me most of the day Thursday just to recover. I think I could have slept for the rest of the week, I was that tired. We had the craziest dinner Thursday night because I didn't have the energy to plan anything so the kids ended up eating BBQ chicken wings with garlic bread.

So here it is, TGIFriday. Steve is home but he and S3 are going to a 76ers game tonight with some friends. Saturday T has a candy making party for his Sunday school class and then a pool party for a kid on his soccer team. G is going to Lancaster for a Build-A-Bear party. I promised S3 I'd take him to GameStop to trade in some PS2 games and then after that I think I can breathe again.

Phew!

Olympic Weekend

We had a crazy sports weekend, running from one athletic event to the next. Friends of ours have a superstar daughter who plays volleyball, basketball, soccer, track, etc. This weekend she had a volleyball tournament so we ran to Harrisburg to watch her play. Then Sunday both Ty and G had soccer games. I think we were just about blown to pieces during the games. I have some video of the girls that I need to edit yet but in the mean time, enjoy these pics.

And my personal favorite shot from the weekend....
"Winnie the Pooh as Goalkeep"

P.S. The cute little brunette is my niece Eeyore (a.k.a Winnie the Pooh the Goalkeep).